honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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