PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize