oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
i think my cat just said my name.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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