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the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
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