Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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