I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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