went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
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and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
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Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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