Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just pynch a tree in the face
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize