dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
you never un-have a 4some
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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