3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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