Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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