i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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