so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
The beer is more important than you right now.
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He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
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I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
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