I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
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