Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
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I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize