I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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