I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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