My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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