My first STD was from a foam party
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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