Texts From Last Night

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  (602): View more from Arizona

  You can't motorboat a personality

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  (602): You can't motorboat a personality http://tfl.nu/gveo
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.

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  (202): i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left. http://tfl.nu/4tq4
  Replies (10) Good night (887) Bad night (2455) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk

  (678): View more from Georgia

  discrete masterbation is a lost art

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  (770): Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk (678): discrete masterbation is a lost art http://tfl.nu/z067
  Replies (32) Good night (550) Bad night (2621)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning

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  (609): at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning http://tfl.nu/nizm
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.

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  (604): Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub. http://tfl.nu/91f9
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.

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  (+44): Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though. http://tfl.nu/3f7o
  Replies (7) Good night (5070) Bad night (782)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me

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  (807): her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me http://tfl.nu/f0ty
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.

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  (519): Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even. http://tfl.nu/28ty
  Replies (7) Good night (2506) Bad night (529) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god

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  (406): We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god http://tfl.nu/kj7l
  Replies (2) Good night (1223) Bad night (1244) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself

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  (540): Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself http://tfl.nu/tr5c
  Replies (3) Good night (1148) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...

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  (540): So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day... http://tfl.nu/14rg
  Replies (5) Good night (1076) Bad night (395)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.

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  (906): I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/hho5
  Replies (12) Good night (2368) Bad night (386) Order T-Shirt
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.

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  (763): FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth. http://tfl.nu/ynrg
  Replies (2) Good night (1013) Bad night (523) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.

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  (310): We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us. http://tfl.nu/nid9
  Replies (3) Good night (311) Bad night (705) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.

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  (847): I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B. http://tfl.nu/1rlu
  Replies (8) Good night (398) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt

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