so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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