I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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