I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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