Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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