cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
just tell him i said nine months
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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