Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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