Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
wow bdsm is so cute
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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