maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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