Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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