I think im going to throw up on grandma
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize