i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize