apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
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Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
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A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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