I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize