I want to stick my p in your. b.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
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You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
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She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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