I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
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then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
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My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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