I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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