ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
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It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
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There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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