listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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