so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize