how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Randomize