Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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