Rock
Scissors
Fuck
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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