i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize