I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize