You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize