coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize