This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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