so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize