Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Can i not drive my cunt home
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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