I like to think it a success when the cops are called
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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